Women Reveal How To Successfully Initiate The 'What Are We?' Conversation

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abbyadler
Apr 29, 2022 3:00 PM EDT

There are so many words to describe how we feel about one another, and yet when it comes down to it, none of us feel comfortable expressing our true feelings. It's really important to let people know how we're feeling so we can progress in the relationship if the other person feels the same way, or let the relationship go if they're not on the same page. Nonetheless, it's really hard to muster up the courage to put our feelings front and center in a conversation with the person we've been feeling for a while now. Why is it so difficult to share how we feel?! If we were all more open and honest about our feelings, the world would be a better place. In an AskWomen post, women exchanged tips on how to bring up the 'what are we?' conversation. The most popular option was to just be straightforward about it, no matter how the person responds to the feelings you're putting out there. 

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  • 01
    Font - Posted by 8 u/ieatfriedpickles 15 hours ago How would you initiate the "what are we" talk?
    via u/ieatfriedpickles

    Let it out, ladies. Your feelings deserve to be heard. 

  • 02
    Font - EmpressSquirrel · 10 hr. ago Sit him down and say: Look we need to be on same page here. We exclusive or not? I'm not mad either way but if our wants aren't aligning then we both need to go find someone to give us what we need. It's cool if you don't want a relationship and I'm not gonna try to force one. But while I enjoy being with you, if we're going to continue to spend time with each other I need to be in an actual relationship. Be direct and to the point. Men aren't typically great
    via u/EmpressSquirrel

    No more guessing games. Tell it like it is. 

  • 03
    Font - Cindershrooms · 10 hr. ago I joked about it with my fiancé when we were talking Something along the lines of people thinking we were dating came up, I replied "ARENT we though" He shot me down lol So we both laughed it off, communicated clear and loyal interest in eachother. It's a hard thing to do honestly, it's so nerve wracking but I'd always choose to joke about it.
    via u/Cindershrooms
  • 04
    Font - PopKornAndMMs · 10 hr. ago Lol I wasted no time with my husband when we were just 6 dates deep. Verbatim: "So, since we're sexually active and spending every single day together, I think it would be responsible to discuss exclusivity. Y'know, to lower the risk of STDS and hurt feelings.." And basically told him he was boyfriend.
    via u/PopKornAndMMs
  • 05
    Font - Jalenna · 13 hr. ago Tell them I like them and ask if they want to be a couple (or whatever I'd like us to be). I don't understand the point of asking, "what are we?" and letting them steer the conversation. It seems better to indicate what I want and avoid some awkwardness and confusion.
    via u/Jalenna
  • 06
    Font - katih1002 · 13 hr. ago Literally just told my now boyfriend "as you know I've been having a really good time with you. I just wanted to check in, see how your feeling, and how you would label us?" He got the gist from there
    via u/katih1002
  • 07
    Font - whyamihere0113 · 13 hr. ago The only time I had this conversation i just asked "hey, what are we?". He said I was his girlfriend and I said he never asked me... 3 days later he asked me to be his girlfriend and I said yes hahahahaha
    via u/whyamihere0113
  • 08
    Font - kallisti_gold · 15 hr. ago It's typically along the lines of • I think you're really awesome • I wanna be awesome together with you for awhile • How do you feel about that?
    via u/kallisti_gold
  • 09
    Product - Maleficent_Bunch5702 · 14 hr. ago Honest and to the point. "We've been hanging out for a while now and I would like to know where you see this going?"
    via u/Maleficent_Bunch5702
  • 10
    Font - littleee_sunshine · 10 hr. ago Simple..just say the following: Are we dating? Are we fuckin? Are we best friends? Are we something in between that?
    via u/littleee_sunshine
  • 11
    Font - EliseUvU · 14 hr. ago How me and my gf went; Friend: "So are y'all datingggg??" Me: shrug, sideglance "are we dating?" Her: "ok, sure."
    via u/EliseUvU
  • 12
    Rectangle - Seweeenaa · 13 hr. ago Simple I like you Will you live in my basement tied to my bed forever?
    via u/Seweeenaa

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